am i so selfish? nilaikan diri anda2 jugak!

diz week,, terrible~

a lot of things happen within juz 2 n 3 days~

d 1st day started wif a severe headache...

too much of pressure.. in ward, too much of thinking, perhaps~

DUGAAN~

n U~!!

u said u want to b wif me..

but, where r u??

where?

when im so lonely, u oso do ur own bsness~

1 msg per day? LIKE~

i juz wanna c u..

i juz can contact u, if i want, but i wait 4 ur action~

owhh, mybe u r soooo bz..

yup, its rite~

u r bz~ but then if im bz, wth wif ur 'urmmmm'?

never mind.. go on wif ur way~

i wont say anything..

i can accept ady , & i can tc of myself even no 1 in my life now~

yes! i can tc of myself~

no nid 2 think how i am today~ what am i doing~ coz im juz very fine here~

& 1 more, my bad again comes along~

i wont statisfied until i noe everything clearly~

coz i dun like,, im so annoying, i rily noe~

IM RILY SORRY~

im so ----->> @#$%^&* =(

"benda yg remeh slalu di jadikan masalah besar...asyik2 emosi.."

ckup3 menusuk..................

ye, sy mmg ske besarkn bnde remeh temeh..

im so sory..

i dun ever noe why am i bcum very2 sensitive smpai nk besar2kan bnde remeh temeh~

now,, bcum more, more n more snsitive~

rily2 sory for all my words, for all my mistakes i've done~

dh x bnyak mase kte ad..

hope mase yg ad neh dpt beri kenangan yg indah2 wat kte..

& i hope, d last day u r here, u will fullfill ur promise~

* u noe what? i think i can remember all ur words throughout our frenship~

& im rily sory when i can do nothing when u rily want me 2 do sumthing~

thinking~ again.......... & again.... until i die!

bnyak utk difikir,,

smpai xtawu yg mne nk fikir............

bnyak btol salah aku smpai xtawu ade x yg btol..

n now, d headache is coming............

biar!

pikir smpai mati~

* aku mntak maaf ble aku xdpt control mrh aku..

ble aku lpas kt owg laen..

ble aku wat prangai teruk2..

maafkn aku..

hope persahabatan kte brpanjangan..

aku syg kamu, sahabat~

* maaf ble sy xtawu nk wat kptusan tntg hati sy,

sy syg awk,

tp sy xley awk asyik tnye tntg prasaan sy...

ckup2 la ble sy dh ckp sy syg awk.. ape agi awk nk sy ckp?

perlu kew sy ckp pnjang2 & biar awak pikir bnyak2 kali tntg prasaan sy?

sy xnk nnti sy tros baran & wat awk agi..

tlg paham sy cmne...

jgn irritate sy ngn soalan2 yg pelik2...

awk tlg la pikirkan utk sy ape yg awk nak..

sy dh xlarat nk pikir.............................

* ble ngah buntu neh, xde sape utk dibgtaw...

so, trpakse cari blog neh, ckp tntg prasaan kt cni..

kat mne agi nk gtaw kn..

dh xde sape!!!

xde sape ngn sy!!!

col mak,, xdpt~

ntah ape yg prob, line ke ape ke...

xde sape!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dh xde sape!!!!

die ckp die ad, tp,, sy xtawu ape brita die..

ase sy nk pegi je sne!

if ad trnsport sndirik, dh lame sy smpai sane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tp sy xnk wat die isau, wat die mrh~

tp sy nk tawu sal die!!!!!

nak ad ngn die!!!!

die xnk sy kew??

* mlm yg amat sunyi..

tnpa ketawa, tanpa senyuman...

hnya kerutan di dahi...

& airmata peneman hati....

xde penawar....

sujud...................................

* maaf utk sume owg, b, kwn2,,

im not perfect, n i dun try my best 2 b d bestest!

but, i want u all 2 noe dat u all r my bestest!!!

my bestest fren, bestest bf, bestest sis~

i hope u noe...pleaz remember me, & forgive me when i still got time~

coz i still wanna see ur smile, hear ur laugh, hold ur hands,,, hug u when u r in blue.....

& pleaz b wif me.... coz i cant lose u all.........................................

* of coz i do want to take care of ur heart, but yet, im so selfish~

only want other people to tc of my heart~

wanna noe sumthing?

im so sory if u r pain bcoz of my words,, but, only wif u,, sy jujur ngn sume bnde..

sy gtaw sume...

except d 1 i want 2 surprise u~

buntu-buntu-buntu....

tlg aku Ya Allah~

aku buntu........................

bertimpa2 Kau uji hambaMu ini Ya ALLAH..

ad sape skrg..

sunyi sgt2...

nk gtaw sape??

xde sape...

perit ble simpan sume..

n dpt nk tenangkn sape2..

cukup perit,,

if diz thing also considered as remeh temeh,,,

i dun noe what 2 do anymore...

sume bersarang kt hati neh...

Ya ALLAH,, aku tahu Kau sntiasa di sisi ble sume owg xde d sisi aku...

tlg jgn tinggalkan aku Ya ALLAH....

aku xde sape2..........................aku perlukanMU....

sujud..............................................................

multiple entries.............. in 1 entry..

29 Mei 2011 @ 0930,, mak berangkat ke KLIA..brkumpul kt sne, nk pegi umrah........

n now, mak dh ad kat sna~

windu ngn mak makin menebal~ dr hari ke hari~

im counting days to meet her..............

"smoga mak dberi kesihatan yg baek, dpt kerjakan ibadah dgn sempurna kat sna~

doakan mak........." tu yg mak bisik sbelom brangkat pegi...

insyaALLAH mak,,,

adik sntiasa doakan mak....

mak jg diri ye kt sna...

pulang dgn slamat ye..

jgn isau kami kt sini....

doakan adik bnyak2 ye mak.............

smoga adik dpt jadi anak yg baek utk mak...

adik x kesah mak x beli pape utk adik, adik cuma nk tgk mak blk dgn slamat je...

tu hadiah yg paling berharga utk adik.........

adik isaukan mak............................................................ =(

*ayah,, mak dh g umrah...

mak g ngn mak lang~

ayah, mak dh wat upah haji utk ayah~

nnti bley la guna Haji Saaban kn?

adik syg ayah...

syg mak....

maaf adik x jadi anak yg baek...............

*maaf kn sy bila sy ngade2..

nak itu ini...

mcm tu, cmni..

sy berubah~ ye, sy dh brubah....

jgn explain pape..

asyik nk owg jg hati sy,, sy??

ok, bawu sy tawu.....

so mmg btol la sy neh ngade kn?

ye, mmg sy ngaku sy ngade..

bub sy tawu, nnti dh xley nk ngade ngn awk..

bub tu sy nk sume nye skrg....

mase tu dh hampir............

makin hampir...................................

maaf.. ini,, empty........................................

x pikir owg laen~

selfish!!

( tp sy pikir, nape ble awk mintak sy wat bnde yg paling sy x ske, sy bley wat~

sy lupekan sal hati sy,, sy lpekan prasaan sy,, tp ble sy mintak,,

awk xley korbankn utk sy? sy boley je tebalkan muka sy, sy boley je senyum, bley je sume........even dlm hati neh, Tuhan je yg tawu.... xpela.. neh bnde remeh je........ )

im such a @#$%^&*(*&^%$%*~!! i noe...

again 4 my S-A-H-A-B-A-T~

jika ari ini aku lupa diri, tlg ingatkn aku~

jika ari ini aku menangis, tlg tenangkn aku~

jika ari ini aku terjatuh, bangunkan lah aku~

kerana aku sgt2 perlukan sahabat seperti kamu.......

mungkin bila semakin meningkat dewasa,

aku smakin alpa dgn permainan dunia~

smakin lupa kenangan2 lalu~

yg percayalah,, aku x mahu lupakan.....

tp, aku manusia~

manusia yg penuh kehinaan~

yg penuh dgn sifat2 mazmumah~

aku mahu jd yg terbaik,

tp aku sedar, aku x mampu....

aku mahu buat semua org gembira dgn kehadiran aku,

tp aku sbenarnya menambah luka & perit mereka..

mungkin sebab aku trlalu ingin jd yg terbaik,

aku GAGAL~!!

maafkan aku wahai teman~

petikan lagu neh utk semua sahabat ku....

-- Oh Tuhan
Tunjukkan ku jalan
Untuk menempuhi dugaan ini
Teman, maafkan jika ku melukaimu
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